I’m a lazy, lazy man

I had planned to be back by now with the usual offering of deep thoughts, profound insights and knee-slapping humor. (Aw, who am I kidding? Make that “half-baked rantings, pedestrian observations and mawkish attempts to be funny.”) But now that Christmas has come and gone, the holidays suddenly seem worth enjoying.

Toward that end, I spent an afternoon bombing around the woods on an ATV, visited the Georgia Guidestones, discovered the perverse joys of the TV show “Dexter,” had wine with every dinner, avoided newspapers for several days and generally kept club hours (up late, sleep late). Still ahead of me are several books, many college football bowl games and a persistent disdain for anything that feels like work.

All that’s a long way of saying I’m off duty for the rest of the week. See you Monday, Jan. 5.

9 Responses to “I’m a lazy, lazy man”

  1. I.C. Says:

    Enjoy! Happy New Year and when you get back, continue to assemble words well for those of us who enjoy your work so much.

  2. BP Says:

    Apparently you aren’t the only lazy man (person), not many postings to your last couple of entries. Have a great time laying about, although I have never understood what folks see in football, particularly this unseemly proliferation of bowl games. Tidybowl anyone?

  3. Joyce Says:

    Oh the joys of self employment! I’m so glad to see that you found something about the holidays to celebrate. There is a lot to be grateful for - any time of the year, for that matter. Counting your able-bodied blessings (and friends) and enjoying them is chief among them! Cheers! Chat with you in the New Year!

  4. Joyce Says:

    And ‘Dexter’ is a great show! One of my guilty pleasures!

  5. John Says:

    Gearino, you’re worthless and weak. You make me wanna puke. You do not pack the gear to serve our beloved blog.
    Drop and give me twenty.

    Since you’ll be extending your beauty sleep, I guess I’ll have to check out my life coach, Matt Furey’s web site. He’s kinda like you except he’s got bigger guns and he never takes a day off. His keys to success are based on a balanced diet (including plenty of roughage) five hunderd squat thrusts upon rising each morning and selling flower seeds on the internet.

    Enjoy your extended vacation - wuss.

  6. John Says:


    Depending on the duration and intensity of your hangover, you may not be able to summon sufficient concentration and energy to compose a column by Monday. That’s the day-after-tomorrow dude.

    How about a few suggestions for topics? Thanks aren’t necessary. What are unsolicited friends for?

    * “Out” everybody who posts to WAW with their real name and email address. Who among us doesn’t crave the true identity of Locomotion Breath? That is his real name? Shit. OK, what about Walter Abbott - surely that’s a psuedonym.
    * I’m interested in your pet peeves. I expect I’m not alone. How about a list? I bet we got a lot in common. Like doesn’t it bother you when your underwear rides up on ye? Especially in public. It’s mighty hard to discreetly extricate yourself from the attending discomfort too.
    * You could do an article on Ponzi schemes. That’s kinda timely. Just don’t defend Madoff. I know you got a soft spot in your heart for scoundrels (like Big Oil) unless they’re in the news biz or politics.
    * I think there’s new trouble between the Israelis and Palestinians. Pat Robertson is pretty worked up about it. I think he’s ready to dust off some of our nuclear inventory.
    * There must be something cookin’ in The Triangle that’s worthy of your attention and unique perspective. Gossip perhaps. Maybe one of the local news anchors faked his resume - he really didn’t win a Peabody for his work as a combat correspondent during the Grenada conflict - was there any combat in the Grenada conflict?
    * How about a word jumble every once in a while? We could unscramble WAW-related words. Here’s an example: you called me this one time in a private response to a post I made to your column: HASSOLE. That one’s a gimme I guess.
    * You haven’t awarded a Yanky Dime for quite a while. I miss that.

  7. Steve Eisenstadt Says:

    Oh, we must discuss “Dexter.”

  8. I.C. Says:

    OK…I think I’m violating one of the new rules but is there only one John or are the last two comments from different people? If they are both from the John I remember from much earlier posts, “Hi, to you”, and I hope Dan never “outs” me! TMI on the underwear, Sweetie….

    …and hangovers are meant to last until Monday, aren’t they?

  9. Brunette Says:

    John, it is true that Dan has been remiss, but you’re doing a pretty good job taking up the slack. I urge you NOT to renounce drinking in the New Year.

    Bring on more HASSOLE.

    Dan, you’re not just a lazy, lazy but a lucky man. Were it not for John’s rants, some of us would have been forced to abandon your blog for more active ones.

    Wake up man!