Archive for January, 2008

Spare the rod? Here’s what you get

Wednesday, January 30th, 2008

If you already know about Corey, then you surely want to slap him. I’ll hook you up with that opportunity in a minute, but meanwhile let me explain about him to everyone else.

Corey is a 16-year-old lout in Australia who held a big party at his house one night a few weeks ago when his parents were out of town. In his case, “big” is an absolute, rather than relative, term: 500 people attended the event, which grew so rowdy that police officers who sought to quell the disturbance were sent running for safety when their vehicles were attacked. By the time the property damage was totaled, the bill came to $20,000. The parents, naturally, are on the hook.

But that’s not what made Corey a global news figure. That came only with the insolence and lack of contrition he put on display for TV reporters. That, and the stupid yellow sunglasses he refused to take off. (His initial TV interview can be found here, while this short clip shows a radio announcer trying to remove Corey’s shades — which I’ll bet is the most most common impulse among adults, after backhanding the smirking punk.)

For the past couple of weeks, Australian newspapers have offered updates on Corey’s fate on a near-daily basis. For a while, he simply avoided his parents, hanging out at the beach and claiming he was already planning his next party. He eventually went home, and then — apparently with his parents’ consent — signed on to become a professional party planner. All the while, he reveled in the fact that he’d not only dodged any consequence to his defiance, but has actually profited from it.

To a certain slice of the world’s population, Corey is a folk hero. But for the rest of us, he’s just a youngster who needs a good …

Well, I promised you the opportunity. Go here and slap to your heart’s content.